I am the one that only believe in others, damn trust, previously, once upon the time. Yes, I am the one that super dump that always been cheated all the time because of the trust. I am the one that people choose to manipulate and lie due to the too much concern of others. After sometime, then I put full stop. They sick and made me sick too. Honestly, I still learn how to stop to believe others and if I am in the trust game, ill do well. People won't notice I do care about trust and don't trust them 100 percent. Am I good actor? No! please bare it as gift and talent. Too many things, too much thinking. So many (if I can put s at many to define damn f many!)
Since then I manipulate the thing. I am the one that control everything. I am the one that make people look like dump and seduce them with the falsity. Please do not rate them as revenge but the circle of awareness towards the world madness. Now, I seldom put trust on people. Too much pain and sore made me cautious, extra careful and most of the times go with play safe mode. People that can earn my trust truly gifted. The gift from God to myself. They can be good friends, brothers and sisters, families, lover(s). Because, those, I cannot simply push it away even how hard I convince myself to not let them be.
The truth, loyalty, honesty, sincere, you name it.
Tired to deal with those and that what make I am now. People tend to focus on the mistake and forget everything good you done. For me, I don't ask them to do well as the return, but enough when they don’t hurt me. Talking back about trust, it cause hurting. Yes it is. People hurting other people in breaking the trust given, then don’t go trust. Dealing with mixes and different different type of heart is hard. Why we can be the sole that like everybody and been liked by everybody? No answer! Well, I want to earn as much credit as I can. Go f*cking with the hell who didn’t understand. Not make me taller nor shorter, in deed.
Please God, put some trusting people around me because I missed myself, the one that trust people. Unfortunate as far as time is concern, not yet! Still waiting....